Bullying is not just a school thing. It happens at the work place too. If you are being bullied at work in anyway by anyone (even the boss–a good boss DOESN’T bully!!! DON’T FALL FOR THAT LIE!!! TOOOOO MANY PEOPLE FALL FOR THAT!!! ). Admit to yourself that you are being bullied and try not to fall into the trap of saying that you are being “too sensitive”(ßthat’s a lie to keep competition going at work. There’s no need to compete with anyone. They hired you because they need you!) Speak up for your soul’s sake—for your MIND and heart!! I know that it’s not easy but think of it this way: there is a kid inside of you who relies on YOU to protect him or her.
I would not give this type of advice if I myself had not spoken up about being bullied TO the people who bullied me. I’ve had more jobs in my 16 years of working than MOST people have in 1/3 of their life. Strange but true.
So often in the past when I got hired at a new place, people didn’t know how to read me/fit me into their mind—it’s like they were insulted because I wasn’t what they wanted me to be—crazy, huh?! From there, assumptions were made and my feelings got hurt BIG TIME. Some people thought that they could bully me because they didn’t know my age (they thought I was super young and inexperienced).
Some chose to bully me because they viewed my kindness as a weakness (Are you f**ng kidding me?! C’mon! So what, now I have to be a douchebag in order for you to think that Im strong?! Wtf?!). I’ve worked with nothing but men, nothing but women, I’ve been the only person in a work place who doesn’t follow 1 religion(and looked at all weird because of it), I’ve been the only one who isn’t bilingual, the one whose “physical appearance doesn’t match her mental status”, the one whose physical appearance “is the reason why she got the job” , the one who “Isn’t what she seems–could it be that she’s not the typical girl I thought she’d be?”, the only one who comes from a super mixed family (when my mom showed up or people looked me up on FB they would ask me the weirdest rudest questions in the RUDEST tone and from there choose to bully me because Im different…wtf?!)…the list goes on…so many ways to bully, so much time to do it…
One day…. the little Alma inside of me took over and then BOOM! I got loads of courage and I was able to speak up. I felt like a loaded gun with one bullet. The wind pushed the trigger…
I spoke up to my boss! You see, he would get really frustrated at things going on with his buyers and in his personal life. From there he would let of steam by JOYFULLY ordering me around like some asshole mindless intern with no spine and a shit income. WRONG! I got him and I did it in front of a client AND HIS higher up. It wasn’t planned at all. I promise. I called him a jackass and told him to run his own tasks and figure shit out on his own. I left the office, took a walk around the block and then came back.
Now…before you go and do this and get fired, I just want to say that he and I had this coming and that this is just an example of what bullying can lead to.
I held in a lot and he got away with so much. Also, at this time I was looking for a new job to replace the one that I was in and I had enough money to fall back on in case I got laid off or decided to leave my position.
O.K. so, I got back and sat down still with that look on my face that read “Say the right thing to me; don’t say something dumb and evil.” After a few minutes, my boss called me into his office and we talked. He did most of the talking, actually (I didn’t want to say much because I was so angry). He apologized to me for being a dickhead and he was really nice about it. I thanked him and then he asked if I could forgive him. I expressed that I wasn’t sure if I knew the true meaning of forgiveness but I could definatley put the incident behind me. He said “Fine”, and from there we moved forward.
Take inventory of your life and the people you surround yourself with. Some people LIKE bullying you because they are certain that you will not stop them from running you over.
So, you are an adult- big f**ing deal! Lots of adults get bullied and ARE bullies!! Who do you think most children learn the way of the bully from?!! ADULTS!! HELLO!!!
Weed out the bullies. Watch them from a distance and you will see that they are really sensitive people who are terrified of not being taken seriously or heard. Bullies want people to fear them and love them too…yuck!
Observe your bullie(s) and when they come at you, talk a deep breath the same way you would if a huge tidal wave were approaching you and then either stand your ground or duck under.
<3
Alma
January 9th, 2012
Alma


